this is how powerless am i.

i am not believed for the new year resolution for more than 2 years; I think the most efficient way to do the resolution is consistency. do it everyday. i believe that all the good or bad things never happen for the coincidence, but consequence.

the more i focus of something i want in 10 years before, then next 10; i harvested all the fruits. sometimes i asked my very self why i focus so wrong that my very now self have to re-focus something else. but something i won’t do be; i never blamed my very self. i knew he has some limited resources, idea, inspiration, supports; the best way to my future self to not feel bad or try to refocus again; I need to look more ahead. look beyond my next future self. be the proud ones that when i look back, never feel sad.

so now i try not procrastination; i do all the lists i need to do, plans ahead. but when i look at the result… i stunt.


2014-04-01 11.46.33

this is my last month tracks;

legend y meant i passed at that day.

HIIT meant i do HIIT workout more than 10 mins

run meant i run for more than 5 km, thus i will try 10 km on May

swimming is one hour in swimming pool

no softdrink is no any carbonated drink for whole day

and coffee no sugar meant, i can put milk in but only that.


none of that all y: and if you count on that, i failed more than 50%

I failed myself, very hard.

but in stead stop here, i can only say that i’m not clever, or not intelligence enough to find the more short cut way.

to stay tune, to practices self discipline, strong will, and my organise self skill more than this.

i wish i will better today. because only today we can grow. don’t push the burden to your tomorrow self. he will have too much loads and cannot carry on what you wish for today.

and if i try to do things, i never left it there till the very end, very end of end. I promise, for sure.